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"Kayden's Law" is named after Kayden Mancuso, a 7-year-old girl from Bucks County, Pennsylvania who was murdered by her father during his court-ordered unsupervised parenting time.
The Keeping Children Safe From Family Violence Act or "Kayden's Law" in the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA ) provides federal funds to states which improve their child custody laws to better protect at-risk children by:
1. Restricting expert testimony to only those who are appropriately qualified to provide it: Evidence from court appointed or outside professionals regarding alleged abuse may be admitted only when the professional possesses demonstrated expertise and experience in working with victims of the types of abuse at issue, whether domestic violence, child abuse, or child sexual abuse.
2. Limiting the use of reunification camps and therapies which cannot be proven to be safe and effective: No “reunification treatment” may be ordered by the court without scientifically valid and generally accepted proof of the safety, effectiveness, and therapeutic value of the particular treatment.
3. Providing evidence-based ongoing training to judges and court personnel on family violence, including: (i) child sexual abuse; (ii) physical abuse; (iii) emotional abuse; (iv) coercive control; (v) implicit and explicit bias; (vi) trauma; (vii) long and short-term impacts of domestic violence and child abuse on children; and (viii) victim and perpetrator behaviors.
4. Requiring that family courts making parenting time decisions consider past evidence of abuse, including protection orders, convictions and arrests for domestic violence or child abuse.
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When an abusive relationship ends, the abusers need for power and control does not disappear, it merely transitions to a new form of abuse called post separation abuse. The platform for post separation abuse is the family court system and the abuser weaponizes the children and family court professionals to maintain power and control.
Coercive Control
• Creates a sense of fear that pervades all elements of the safe parent’s life
• Consistently belittles, undermines, shames, and criticizes the safe parent to abuse emotionally
• Strategically manipulates family, friends, or community into conflict with the safe parent to remain in control and gain an advantage (triangulation)
• Imposes a false narrative to make the safe parent doubt their reality, memory, and perceptions (gaslighting)
Counter Parenting
• Undermines the safe parent’s parenting abilities and decisions
• Denies or withholds consent/care for child’s medical or therapeutic needs
• Seeks to impose opposing values in the child to spite the safe parent
When the unhealthy parent has so much hatred for the other parent that their judgment center is compromised, and their actions are driven by revenge and anger. This person is unable to act in the best interest of their child and is unable to move forward in a healthy direction. They use every opportunity to berate, chastise or make digs at the healthy parent. They undermine the healthy parent by disrupting the child’s sleep schedule, diet and routines. They contradict established rules and withhold information. Ignoring school responsibilities, projects and homework to create chaos for the healthy parent. It’s also using the parenting time schedule as a weapon and, forcing custody schedules that are not in the best interest of the child. The abuser is so focused on hurting and controlling the other parent that their actions directly affect the children.
Neglectful/Abusive Parenting
• Exposes children to unsafe content, situations, or people, which creates concern and fear in the safe parent
• Uses violence, intimidation, threats, manipulation, and ridicule to gain compliance from the children
• Abusive parent places their own needs above the needs of the child
Exposing children to unsafe situations or people, the unhealthy parent’s motivation is to cause concern and fear for the other parent. Their parenting style is neglectful and includes varying degrees of abuse. The unhealthy parent is known to use violence, intimidation, threats, manipulation, and ridicule to gain compliance from the children. The unhealthy parent manipulates the children using their wants, needs, fears, and feelings. These behaviors often fly under the radar and are difficult to prove. Children are often unable to articulate their experiences properly to trusted adults and are often punished for speaking out, so they are further forced into submission and silenced. The unhealthy parent is known to expose the children to age-inappropriate and harmful television shows, experiences, movies or video games.
Legal Abuse
• Misuse of court proceedings to control, harass, intimidate, coerce, and exhaust the financial and emotional resources of the safe parent
• Disregards court orders, makes false reports, deliberately causes delays in court proceedings, and makes legal threats to assert power and control over the safe parent
• Seeks a change in custody only as a means of revenge, punishment, and continued control over the safe parent
The abuser wears a mask in the courtroom, fooling the top family court professionals such as custody evaluators, therapists, GAL’s and judges. Behind the courtroom mask is malicious intent. A divorce or child custody battle is sport to the high-conflict individual and the courtroom becomes the domain in which he/she inflicts punishment and terror. Typically, very conflict avoidant, the targeted parent is at a huge disadvantage and becomes triggered (PTSD) by this new platform of abuse. This can be paralyzing and debilitating. The unhealthy parent utilizes the court system as a weapon in what is best described as a sick and twisted game. The goal is to destroy the targeted parent financially and emotionally. The abuser’s words and actions are never in alignment when it comes to what they say in court versus how they really behave outside of the courtroom. Uneven playing fields in this arena often results in financial and emotional devastation for the targeted parent.
Alienation Allegations
• Child favors the safe parent and rejects the abusive parent leading to false allegations of alienation
• Parental alienation claims lodged against the safe parent as a legal strategy to cast doubt on their credibility
• Valid claims of abuse labeled as alienation by the abusive parent as a defensive tactic
When the unhealthy parent’s own behavior, neglect or abuse cause the children to reject them, they often lodge allegations of “parental alienation.” Claims of parental alienation (also referred to as alienation, parental alienation syndrome, resist-refuse dynamic, gatekeeping and enmeshment) are commonly invoked as an effective legal strategy to counter abuse claims. Despite the disturbing origin of the alienation movement (ties to pedophilia) and, the equally troublesome present-day movement, the abuser’s legal scheme is frequently successful in family court proceedings. Equally concerning is the fact that parental alienation has no scientific basis, and is not recognized by the American Psychological Association, the World Health Organization, the American Medical Association or any other credible, professional body. Accusations of alienation are the go-to weapon of abusive parents who are attempting to maintain control and inflict pain on their former partner.
READ MORE HERE:
https://www.highconflicteducationandresources.com/post-separation-abuse
When the high-conflict parent’s own actions (abuse) cause the child to reject them, they often claim that the healthy parent is “alienating” them from the child.
Claims of “parental alienation” have infiltrated the already broken family court system. The theory of parental alienation has been debunked, denounced or rejected by every credible organization such as the United Nations (UN), American Psychological Association (APA), American Medical Association (AMA) and the World Health Organization (WHO). Many professionals who work in the alienation industry are driven by a confirmatory bias which is having detrimental effects on families all over the world.
Click here to read the report by the United Nations: Report of the Special Rapporteur on violence against women and girls, its causes and consequences,
History of Parental Alienation: Disgraced psychologist, Richard Gardner coined, “parental alienation syndrome" (PAS) based on his own observations. Known to be "pedophile friendly" and said to be biased against women, none of his work has been peer reviewed. Gardner’s theory is junk science, concocted by a man with ties to pedophilia who took his own life in 2003.
Present Day: There is a large group (and growing) of individuals who have repackaged Garner's theory of PAS and re-labeled it, parental alienation, alienation, and most recently, resist-refuse dynamic. While many do not follow Gardner’s “original version” of the syndrome, the repackaged variations are still used by abusers to take custody from healthy parents. Regardless of the name, it remains the go-tool weapon for abusive, high-conflict individuals who are utilizing the court system to hurt and control their ex-spouse or ex-partner. Abusers also commonly accuse the targeted parent of gatekeeping and enmeshment.
Attorneys and many therapists unethically push alienation claims forward knowing it has no scientific basis or credibility. There are reports of therapists and other family court professionals who are financially incentivized to label children as "alienated." In extreme situations, children are removed from their safe parent and sent to reunification camps. These camps continue to be exposed by news organizations and investigative reporters however, they presently remain operational. At HCE&R, we are dedicated to shining light on this very dark movement that is negatively impacting children all over the world.
Why Would a Child Reject a Parent?
For these reasons and many others, the child naturally recoils from the abusive parent and often rejects them. This is a healthy, defense and protection mechanism. In our everyday lives, we strive for our children to listen to their intuition, to have boundaries and to protect themselves from harm. Unfortunately, when children in the family court system stand in their power, they risk being taken away from their safe parent. In the family court system, the expectation is to force children to override their own inner voice which was designed to protect them and, to encourage them to have a relationship with a toxic, abusive individual whose only objective is to weaponize the child in an effort to exert control.
Allegations of alienation, gatekeeping and enmeshment are a form of post-separation abuse and should serve as a red flag to family court professionals.
Resources for those facing allegations of parental alienation:
A child rejecting a parent can be a complex and emotionally challenging situation, and it can stem from various reasons. The causes can range from specific behavioral patterns to deeper emotional or psychological issues.
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